Last night before bed I decided to spend some time doing some heavy meditation. I spent a little over 30 minutes meditating with binaural beats with music. When I was meditating, I saw and felt something very very magical.
At first I saw myself in the cosmos and I was gently floating into the arms of a goddess like figure, made from the stars and cosmos around us. I could feel myself falling into a deeper state of meditation.
I saw myself standing on the ground right next to a middle-sized tree. I wasn’t in a human form at all. I remember being some kind of animal, a mix between a wolf, a dragon, and something else. I was a light blue color with bright blue eyes. I could see myself running and then taking off from the ground and going up higher and higher into the summit. I could see orbs and smaller energy forms forming around my shoulders and wings as I went through several layers of clouds. They followed me as the ones who were meant to stay on the ground, stayed on the ground. I was tempted to look back, but I didn’t. I was urged to keep going higher.
At one point I heard something say, “This is what happens when you get sick and don’t take care of yourself” I saw myself falling from the sky and then falling into a body of water. I felt tired and alone. I wasn’t able to get back up into the sky. I came back out and wandered along the side of the water, through thick brush and trees, trying to find a place to recuperate. I found a place to lie down for a bit. Then I remember getting up and finding a small waterfall. There was someone there by the waterfall. I don’t quite remember who the person was, but they felt familiar. I also remember at that point being a human again. The waterfall began to glow and then light began to fill everything around us. Life began to bloom and the color was restored within everything around me. The person by me waved at me and then I took off into the skies again.
After awhile all I could see is what appeared to be a valley created by the cosmos. It was filled with dark red and purple dust. I could hear a gentle voice speaking affirmations to me which made me feel at ease. That same voice told me to ignore the ones that spoke poorly about myself, the one filled with negativity that would throw me off. That was the voice that was my ego; the ego that is influenced by anger and fear. After that I woke up feeling relaxed and ready for bed.
Straight sacred lines turn into cracks in due time.
All the cracks will crawl straight to me.
They spread as roots from a tree spread into the soil.
Everything the cracks impose is unavoidable.
Going beyond; the cracks betray the line in the sand.
What was once sacred is nothing now.
Washed away from the massive gusts of rain and dust.
This cycle will never change.
The lines can never be filled; the breaks will never be repaired.
The worst has yet to come and I am not prepared.
Everyone has their own idea of what kinds of stimuli brings on the tingles for them. Perhaps we all have similar things that cause us to get those tingles. Do any of these things cause you to get the warm fuzzies or tingles in the back of your neck and spine?:
- Feeling the soft tingles in your neck and shoulders from someone gently scratching your back.
- Inhaling the sweet smell of freshly made tea/coffee.
- Drinking ice cold water on a scorching hot day.
- Getting a manicure/pedicure.
- Giving/receiving a hug from a friend or loved one.
- Snuggling on the couch or bed with your dog/cat.
- Biting into a melty chocolate chip cookie fresh from the oven.
- Walking into a candle shop and smelling all of the wonderful candles.
- Stepping into a hot and steamy shower after a long day.
- Stepping foot into a cafe or restaurant with the sweet aroma of food.
- Listening to the sound of rain gently tapping on the window.
- Hopping into a freshly made bed.
- Sitting outside in the warm mid-day sun.
- Stepping outside in the morning on a autumn day and taking a deep breath in the cool breeze.
- Falling into a deep meditation.
I’m stuck. Not just simply stuck.
How did I get this way?
I’m –> Struggling-Tattered-Unbearably-Clutching onto-Kindness
What else can I do? What else should I do?
I’m trapped within myself, trapped within you, trapped within them.
Don’t pity me, I don’t pity me. Can you help me?
Tied, caged, coraled, glued, pasted, chained, gated, drowning….
What does it feel like to feel free?
If you are looking for a reason to smile, then you’re in the right place! The truth is, life is never easy. Problems and obstacles from everyday life to pure crisis can hit us like a ton of bricks at any moment in time. However, there is always a reason to laugh and there is always a reason to smile. Here’s a few nifty facts about smiling:
Smiling is good for you inside and out! So don’t forget to smile! =) Also, if you find this stuff interesting, then you might be interested in The Benefits of Laughter
Believe it or not, swearing isn’t always such a bad thing! In fact, there’s some fun facts that we can learn from swearing.
- In all seriousness, I prefer to use explicit language and profanity over using euphemisms to sugar coat reality. What is it that you would prefer to do?
2. If you were to stub your toe, what would you prefer to yell out in pain: “Fish!” or “Fuck!”? What about if you slam one of your fingers closing a door on accident: “Fudge!” or “Fuck!”? In my personal experience, I feel better swearing when in pain rather than to ‘fudge’ it. What do you think?
Now lastly, here’s one of the real reasons why I made this post today. This is the biggest, most important fact about swearing that makes the act of swearing itself much more innocent and docile:
Swearing might be such a bad thing after all! What do you think?
Hey! I am now on Patreon and Paypal! Any extra support and love that you can give will always be appreciated, thank you very much.
The true monster lies within my head.
I know damn well that it wants me dead.
I feel as though I’m dangling from a single thread.
Sleep has never really been my thing…
I can’t feel joy whether if I write, dance, or sing.
I don’t want to answer the phone when it rings.
It’s ridiculous, no I’m ridiculous!
Take a good look at me.
What is it that you can see?
Maybe if you tell me the truth then you can set me free.
But I know it cannot be… the only one who can tell the truth is me.
(Don’t do this alone… HELP is within your reach)
Please help support Depression Army and their good cause!
(all credit goes to the original owner(s) of featured image)
Blessed be the gifted
Blessed be the gifted and
Blessed be the gifted and loved
Blessed be the gifted and loved liars
Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of
Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the
Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest
Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void
Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void of
Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void of the
Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void in the universe
Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void in the universe… you
Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void in the universe… you are
Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void in the universe… you are fucked.
Don’t be afraid to say yes, and don’t be afraid to say no.
We need to make important decisions in life, even when going with the flow.
Our individual needs, desires, and boundaries are important.
No one can take that away from you and no one has control over you.
Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and become assertive in a loving way.
We are individually in control of our own selves.
So with that, say no to:
People and things that drain you
Doing things that don’t feel ‘right’
Hurting the environment
Things that aren’t good for your health and wellbeing
Taking or destroying other people’s things
Most importantly, say no to things that take away your happiness.
You do matter.
We all have a choice.
Don’t be afraid to say no.
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I still have yet to fully grasp what the true meaning of unmotivation; however, I do know that at one point or another it affects us all. Its that overwhelming shadow that weighs over us, causing us to feel so low to where even doing the things we love doesn’t seem appealing at all. And when it hits you, it hits hard.
Everyone goes through this, everyone. I don’t want anyone to believe that they are alone with this. To me, this is an on and off issue. I can’t quite pinpoint what causes me to feel unmotivated other than stress. When I’m stressed and overtired, it makes me really not want to do much of anything. It really affects me when it comes to the fine arts aspect of me. I absolutely love art, and I hate it when I get demotivated or get ‘artist’s block’.
Unmotivation seems to very well be an aspect of Depression. Regardless, this is something that I know very damn well that this is an obstacle that we can ALL overcome. I believe there are a few things that can be done to help this problem:
- Step back from the overall situation to gain some perspective.
- Take a break from whatever project(s) you are working on (even if its just a brief one).
- Breathe. Always remember to breathe.
- The last thing you would ever want to do is to make it worse. Fighting it and beating yourself up is only going to make the problem worse.
- Have faith and hope that our motivation and drive can and will come back.
In the end, it all works out, believe it or not. Its ok to feel tired, worn down, depressed, unmotivated. We weren’t born to be or feel perfect. Nor were we created to be happy all the time. Always remember these things: Give yourself some credit and a pat on the back for a job well done with everything you do, Breathe calmly and deeply especially when stressed out, Don’t beat yourself up over something you have no control over, Lastly, always remember to look forward.
(all credit goes to original owner(s) of featured media)