Alex Speak · Weird-Crazy-Perhaps Scary · Writing and Poetry

Letter to Dearest: Epilogue (Grande Finale)

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To my dearest,

This will be my final entry to you; this is the end of all endings. 

My chest burns fucking raw from the absolute zero frost inside my heart.

I endlessly curse the skies and damn the grounds from which I stand upon.

I must know!!! Tell me now… tell me this; why does evil exist?

Apathy, carelessness, selfishness, negligence?

An eternal rage that burns even the most innocent of souls. 

Are you feeling pure joy now?

How can this be oh dearest?

Why must the most unconditionally loving souls disintegrate into nothingness?

The innocents suffer and die while the malevolent entities dance and sing. 

I have caught many in their ruthless acts of violence and abuse. 

I’ve even picked up on the smallest wifs of negligence and abandonment.

I condemn the demented souls that walk upon this earth.

I have never wished harm or suffering to be put upon these things…

Except for now… god damn them!

I wish for the forces of god to come and strike down the ones made of filth and lies.

Eradicate the pure evil that walks upon this earth.

Banish the spirits of the damned that roam within these planes of existence.

Rid the souls of light from the abominations that suck us all dry.

Allow the ones who learn from their mistakes a chance to evolve and learn.

I don’t need this, you don’t need this, we don’t need this! 

I’ve lost my fucking mind!!

When will this fucking madness end???

I’m ending this fucking disasterpiece!

THIS ENDS TODAY.

END!

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Alex Speak · Weird-Crazy-Perhaps Scary · World of Psyche · Writing and Poetry

Letter To Dearest- Disasterpiece

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Here I am once again my Dearest;

I am here writing to you once again great disasterpiece creator.

I motherfucking hope that you are happy.

Will my overall being suffice? Or does my vile nature do that.

The nature you imbedded in my feet, gnarling barbed roots twisting into the mud, reaching towards the core.

Bounded to the love you gave me to use… I can still feel it pumping in my veins. 

The fibers of my veins erode away from its acidic effects.

It seeps into my skin and reflects outwards into my aura.

My insides burn infinitely from the blinded rage within.

All that exists has gouged out eyes and drilled through eardrums. 

The walking blind, the crawling deaf, the flying dead, the jaded ones.

Why did you create me dearest? For what purpose? I refuse to believe what it could be.

I’ve heard this all before and before and before that and before them.

Before they came, before they appeared, before they spoke, before they listened.

Before it all began. Before my existence. Before all.

Hell is real. She laughs at our expense. She is aroused by our sorrows.

She’s not a devil, nor a demon, nor a being. She’s in your head. 

Hell exists within our minds alone. Her entity exists in our minds.

The Divine Exists too… he watches me, he follows me, he guides me.

Blinding, morphing, creating, changing…

She smiles in my presence… The Divine smiles in my presence…

What the fuck do you want from me?

You won’t singe me, nor save me.

But now it’s just me… who else?

With me… no one other than my ‘divine’ presence. 

I’m no savior, no saint, no prophet, no healer… nothing.

I am the disasterpiece.

I am your disasterpiece.

You’re welcome.


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(all credit goes to the original owner(s) of featured image)

Alex Speak · World of Psyche · Writing and Poetry

Blessed Be

Blessed be the gifted

Blessed be the gifted and

Blessed be the gifted and loved

Blessed be the gifted and loved liars

Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of

Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the

Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest

Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void

Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void of

Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void of the 

Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void in the universe

Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void in the universe… you

Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void in the universe… you are

Blessed be the gifted and loved liars of the blackest void in the universe… you are fucked.

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Alex Speak · Universal World · World of Psyche · Writing and Poetry

Soul Death Composition

Fallen_angelI have forgotten everything.

Existence itself has become ever so fickle to me.

What does this thing called existence mean?

I can’t remember anything beyond suffering.

My mind has forgotten what exists beyond the clouds.

Is there anything that exists beyond the clouds in my head?

I have forgotten what it was like to be me when I felt alive and whole.

I have been forgotten along with the many other broken souls who lie before me.

We have been left behind within the distant endless swirls of rusty grey dust and ash.

The composition of love is a complex concept for those who have sealed their hearts to avoid the cruel.

The formula of creating the death of a soul is the blackness from unforgiveness, hatred, and unrelenting malice.

Is there hope for the fallen? Is there hope for the broken? Is there hope for the lost? Is there hope for the lonely? Is there hope for the hated? Is there hope for the forgotten?

Yes.


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(NOTE: There is unity, comfort, and support that can be found by confiding in others. Don’t do this alone. You don’t have to do this alone. Help awaits no matter where you are in the world.)

(all credit goes to the original owner(s) of featured image)

 

 

 

Alex Speak · Weird-Crazy-Perhaps Scary

Wrath the Sacred Sinner

I see you’ve stumbled upon my domain.

Prepare yourself for I have a tale that has surpassed the ages.

My heart is an empty void of burning anger and hatred.

Apathy is my true best friend.

I hate everything and everyone on this god forsaken planet.

It’s not true what they say about my anger, or anger generally.

It’s not true that it drains me more than anything else.

It’s not true that it hurts me more than others.

I refuse to accept it.

Anger drives me to success every single time.

I get a rise feeling the rage fill every single particle of my being.

I even feel a sweet sense of satisfaction of spreading my wrath onto others.

Seeing wrath in others arouses me to my core.

The folks that constantly feel that acidic void taking over makes me feel more at home with them.

However, most people are not like that.

Generally, people are just so fucking stupid.

Everything that they do, say, think, and are makes me want to kill them all.

Tear them to pieces like paper in a shredder. 

Suffering and pain drowns out my own the white noise that keeps me up at night.

Listening to their screams in pain is like feeling the sensation of sinking my teeth into the most decadent sweets that exists in this world. 

I don’t pity the ones who are in pain.

They don’t deserve it. 

They don’t deserve your love or my love.

Love never existed within me so that wipes out that even being a miniscule possibility.

I’ve always been cold like this towards others as well as myself.

The people all around me have made me this way.

Alas, that doesn’t mean anything to me anymore.

You’re still huh?

Regardless about how you feel about my words…

All I want to do is see you suffer.

-Alex

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