Positivity and Funnies- Fall is ‘Where it’s at’

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Oh god… it’s here… it’s FINALLY here!!! It’s Autumn!! Who’s ready for some Fall Funnies???

Here we go!

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Sing it everybody! 1, 2, 3, 4!

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That’s right! I’m the cutest drink that you’ll ever find! (And, I’m also limited edition)

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Pug: “I disagree with Mr. Spiky latte there. PUG-in spice lattes are the best of the best!”

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Omg, it’s here!!! Run for your lives!!!

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Yeah… I wouldn’t count on it!

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Well, that took an unexpected turn. >.<

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Who’s ready for Halloween???? =D

7 more days… 7… more… days… are you ready for this?

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The Grove- It’s So Cold

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“Joey!”

The dismal blackness that once took my vision completely melted away. Bright light and a thin canopy of lofty trees popped into my vision. I sat up, rubbed my eyes, and scanned my surroundings. I was sitting in the middle of a large patch of grass which was surrounded by rows of granite and marble gravestones. Some where rounded, plaque like, square, cross-like, or even a statue of some sort. Some of the gravestones seemed more worn down than others. I stood up from the damp, dew covered grass and saw that I was wearing clothes that I have never worn before. Black jeans, tennis shoes, and a flannel with a white tank underneath.

It hit me… I was IN The Grove. The place that haunted me for over a decade. I was standing in the middle of The Grove in broad daylight. I was petrified; I couldn’t move, I couldn’t breathe.

“Joey! Joey! Joey…”

“Wh-wh-wha what? hm?”

“Joooooooooooeeeeeeeyyyyyyy….”

“Who… who’s there?”

“You know who I am, my pretty.”

“That voice…” There’s absolutely no way that it was her. The person who belonged to that voice was dead. Long, long dead.

“Mom?”

“Follow my vooooiiiiccceeeee…. I will guide you home.”

“What do you want from me?” I paused for a moment. “Hello?”

I got no response. Fuck! I don’t know where to go. I don’t know this part of the cemetery at all. I looked around and saw what looked to be a light in the shape of a candlelight flickering in the distance. I had no cell phone, no keys, no map, nothing. I was completely alone out here and I had to get out. I decided to go after the flickering light. I had absolutely nothing to lose.

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(The Grove series has finally returned =) More progress coming soon…)

These Halls- Halloween Night pt. 1

“Alright guys, come hither! Are you ready for some scary stories tonight?”

“Were you finally going to tell us the special story you said you would tell us?”

“Absolutely.” I ushered the little ones in a little pillow fort that we made in the living room. The lights were dimmed with the exceptional glow of flashlights and a battery powered glowing clock that was shaped like a mini lava lamp. Several chairs were lined up around the couches, covered with a massive king sized sheet. They were placed high enough against the couches, some on top of the couches so my husband and I could have enough room sit with the kids. We were in a tight knit circle, halloween candy was sprawled along the floor and a massive bowl of popcorn sat in the middle. Everything was perfect. But still, something in my gut was telling me not to share the story tonight.

“Okay, are you guys ready???”

“Yeahhhhh!!!!” all three chimed in and shouted all at once.

“Alright, here we go!” I paused for a moment to gather my thoughts. My husband wrapped his arm around my shoulder and gave me a look that made me question if this was a good idea or not. I shook my head and sat criss cross on a pillow. “Okay, so did you know that I used to work at a hospital, right?” All three of them shook their heads.

“Well, a long, long time ago I used to be an EMT for a long time. EMT’s are the people that help you get in and out of the ambulance. Not too long after that I became a nurse. Then after that I almost became a doctor, when something happened that changed my entire life forever.” I over exaggerated the story just a tad, but despite the sour memories of my past coming back to haunt me, I carried on. “That something that happened caused the whole entire hospital to shut down.” My husband gently grabbed my hand and squeezed it.

“Why did the hospital close Mommy?” Cherri, our youngest daughter asked. 

“Well honey, there’s truthfully a lot of reasons why this hospital closed down. Some people think it’s because it was time to close it because it was too old. I mean, it had been open since the early 1800’s, maybe even earlier. Another reason is that it could have closed is because-“

“Is it haunted????” Simon, the middle child blurted out. 

“The real reason why it closed was because one of the doctors at the hospital was breaking too many rules. He got in trouble, big enough trouble to the point where the hospital had to be shut down. Lots of people had to look for work elsewhere and patients had to be taken to other hospitals.”

“Was he a bad guy?” Cherri asked. 

“Yes, he was. A very bad guy. And there’s one more thing that caused the hospital to close down…” All three of my beautiful dumplings stared up at me with a look of sheer anticipation. “It was haunted. You were right Simon!”

I heard them gasp as Simon yelled out,”I knew it!” and giggled. I giggled a bit myself.

“How many people die in that place? Was it because of the bad guy?” Simon asked. 

“Some say legend has it that the hospital is haunted because the bad doctor was evil, mad scientist and wanted to make living dolls out of the patients who ‘died’ there. The doctor lost his family to a car accident when he was still in medical school and it caused him to go star-raving mad! The dolls he made were made from human body parts, plastic, and metal parts. One day one of the nurses stepped into the doctor’s office while he was away and walked into a grizzly site. Two full sized adult dolls and three smaller ones were made, sitting around a round coffee table in their own individual seats. He ran out of there as fast as he could and called the police. So the bad-evil doctor was taken to jail and the hospital was never the same since. Due to the bad reputation the hospital developed from the incident, and some eyewitness accounts reporting seeing ghosts, the hospital was shut down. The nurse who was there on that dreaded day swears that to this day that he saw one of the dolls smile and wink at him. Supposedly he died about 10 years ago after he was taken to jail… but I think that the doctor might still be out there somewhere…” 

“BOOGA-BOOGA-BOOGA!!!!!!!!!!!!” My husband yelled out loud while holding a ghostface mask to his face which made the kids scream to the top of their lungs. We couldn’t help but laugh. Right after the shock my husband climbed up from underneath our blanket fort and turned on the living room lights.

“Wha-wha-wh- did that????” Simon yelled out. “Was that a real story???” Cherri was on the verge of tears and Kevin, our oldest tried to make it seem like he wasn’t at all scared, but he was just a teeny bit.

“No stupid, it’s obviously fake. Mom and Dad were just trying to scare us on Halloween.” Said Kevin, our sassy oldest sibling of the bunch. 

“Alright Kevin, that’s enough. All of you guys, it’s time to go to bed.” My husband said. 

“But wait, was that story really true Mom?” Simon asked. I looked at the clock: 11:30 Pm. It was getting late for sure. We all came out from under the fort and we all started to clean up the blankets and put everything away. 

“Only part of it was true sweetie. There was more than one doctor that wasn’t good, but they didn’t do anything crazy like making human dolls. And they planned on making a bigger and better hospital to replace the old one which was getting kinda icky and creaky.”

“Is it haunted?” Kevin asked as he crossed his arms, giving me a look of skepticism. 

“No, not really sweetie. A lot of people said it was just to scare others and to make up silly ghost stories. Now! You guys! Off to bed! It’s 11:30.” And then all three peas in a pod groaned in unison. “Now, give me a hug before you go to bed!” Group hug! Even with husband in the mix. All three children hopped into their beds with no hesitation. Both my husband and I gave each one a hug, kiss, and pat on the head. Not too long after the kids went to bed, we did too. 

“Man honey, you should write that down! That was fantastic.” I looked at him and smiled. I still had that knot in my stomach that I felt when I first began my bizarre story. 

“Thank you Hun. I’ve had thoughts of writing before…” 

“Then why not start now? I mean, I know that what you told the kids tonight was more than just a part of some fake ghost story. I think maybe it might help sort through some of those old, raw memories, don’t you think?” 

“Mhm…” I started to space out. “Yeah… I think I’ll do that…” The next thing I know, it’s lights out…. but only for a moment… what is that noise? 

Part 2 coming soon…

Start from the beginning

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Ha-ha-ha-ha-happy Halloween

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How can you not celebrate this day?

All it takes is a wide smile and an open heart.

Love tricks, pranks, spooks, and scares? No problem.

Love treats, tales, sweets, and dressing up? No problem.

Open for all, open for fall.

We horror junkies find that everyday surrounds this holiday.

Everyone should enjoy this day, whether they celebrate it or not.

Everyone is entitled to have a good time, spooks or not.

Now for those who need to call it a night, sleep tight. (you’re being watched)

 

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Weekly Funnies- Too Funny For Halloween

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For those who don’t enjoy Halloween or the terror behind it all, here’s something that I know will make your Halloween! Not everything needs to be ‘spoopy’ or scary this time of year. There’s always room for a laugh or two, oh and maybe a D’awwww or two.

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Oh god… not the spiders, NOT THE SPIDERS!!!!

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I’m the pumpkin man! I’m not made of snow, but I’m still just as cute! 

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New year, new cut, new style.

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Don’t text and ‘fly’ god dammit!

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I’m soooooooo KAWAII!!!! Love me! Love me!

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I don’t know how to break this to you but… you don’t have a green thumb…. sorry.

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Awww shucks, he just wants a kiss! 

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Wait, what?

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The bar of chocolate a day keeps the Grim Reaper away!

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Hey! Don’t judge me.

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Smooth and classy. =3

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Most unique support group ever… ’nuff said.


I hope that bringing on the funnies brightened your day! Happy Halloween everyone!

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Falling Gravestones

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First and foremost, I am fake being of existance.

Also, I never truly was alive.

Life is just one big joke.

Life is something that never had existed, and probably never will.

I’ve been dead for so long, I forgot what it means to be alive.

Nothing reminds me of the so called life I once lived.

Go ask the ghosts who roam this field, they can’t remember either.

Ghosts around these parts say that these graves fall for those who have been dead for over a century.

Realistically, I suppose that would be true, except for one small thing….

And my reasoning to this matter is that doesn’t count the marauders who steal, tag, play games, or hold rituals around our graves.

Very few and between have come out of this boneyard alive.

Everyone who comes in will never, ever come out.

See, I know because that is what happened to me when I visited my dead daughter long, long ago…

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Creepy tongue twisters~ Can you say them 5 times fast?

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October is here! Finally! Why not kick off the month with some creepy tongue twisters. Can you say them 5 times fast? Perhaps maybe even more than 5 times faster? Go on! Give it a try! 

  1.  Creepy cannibals consume raw meat. 
  2.  Creepy creaky caskets creak open before dawn. 
  3.  Creepy undead cannibals carelessly crawl the streets at night.
  4.  Creepy clowns cruelly torture their victims.
  5.  Creepy callous spirits take form to creep people out.
  6.  Creepy crawly coarse monsters claw away at their victim’s corpses.
  7.  Creepy vampirous civilians only come out at night to play.
  8.  Creepy creatures consume skin from clueless victims. 

Did you enjoy these? Feel free to give them a try or challenge your friends with these silly creepy tongue twisters. Also feel free to leave a comment if you have any questions, comments, or suggestions! 

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