I do, don’t you?

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‘Tis my life’s calling, you know… the darkness fills my soul with enlightenment.

The night is my sanctuary, my happy place, my dwelling, the origin of who I really am.

Don’t insult me with petty excuses on why the darkness should be feared.

It should be loved and embraced by any light spot that blinds you willingly. 

How can you see with those lights in your eyes? Can you see your inner truth now?

Learn to adjust to your eyes to the blackness… allow yourself to succumb to it’s beauty.

Allow it to grip your insides like worms consuming an apple. 

Allow them to eat your hideous mask from the inside out. 

Embrace the decay for it shall lead you to rebirth.

Death is the new birth.

Welcome.


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The Bloodletting

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 What brought on the rolling sea of the dead?

What makes this water so red?

Will sanity take place instead?

Well, these are all very good questions but here’s the answer:

Hell fucking no.

Without the bloodletting, there’d be nothing to show.

People by the thousands would never even know.

It wouldn’t be right to let the violence be unnoticed.

Don’t you agree with this? I certainly do!

You can’t rake bloodmuck under the carpet that sticks to the broom like freshly sliced entrails.

The bloodmuck will continue to overflow and flood civilians.

The bloodmuck is your own filth.

You created the bloodmuck during the sacred bloodletting.

Time to clean it up… good luck.

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Letter To Dearest- Disasterpiece

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Here I am once again my Dearest;

I am here writing to you once again great disasterpiece creator.

I motherfucking hope that you are happy.

Will my overall being suffice? Or does my vile nature do that.

The nature you imbedded in my feet, gnarling barbed roots twisting into the mud, reaching towards the core.

Bounded to the love you gave me to use… I can still feel it pumping in my veins. 

The fibers of my veins erode away from its acidic effects.

It seeps into my skin and reflects outwards into my aura.

My insides burn infinitely from the blinded rage within.

All that exists has gouged out eyes and drilled through eardrums. 

The walking blind, the crawling deaf, the flying dead, the jaded ones.

Why did you create me dearest? For what purpose? I refuse to believe what it could be.

I’ve heard this all before and before and before that and before them.

Before they came, before they appeared, before they spoke, before they listened.

Before it all began. Before my existence. Before all.

Hell is real. She laughs at our expense. She is aroused by our sorrows.

She’s not a devil, nor a demon, nor a being. She’s in your head. 

Hell exists within our minds alone. Her entity exists in our minds.

The Divine Exists too… he watches me, he follows me, he guides me.

Blinding, morphing, creating, changing…

She smiles in my presence… The Divine smiles in my presence…

What the fuck do you want from me?

You won’t singe me, nor save me.

But now it’s just me… who else?

With me… no one other than my ‘divine’ presence. 

I’m no savior, no saint, no prophet, no healer… nothing.

I am the disasterpiece.

I am your disasterpiece.

You’re welcome.


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Suddenly

She makes a sound

Silence shattered freely

Shuttered…

Stuttered…

Seething…

Tonight

Is the only night where she can be…

Initiated…

Potentially the best and worst

Potentially

Plumped with nothing but…

Poisoned rotting cotton.

Beware of  ‘it’…

Beware of the shrouded ones…

Bewitched are they…

Bleating our prayers won’t make it okay.

Believe it now?

Believe…

Dying is easier than living

Definitely easier to deal with!

Death is a sweet cold slumber that you will love…

Don’t forget that your suffering will not end.

Death’s angels always laugh in delight with the devils…

She will speak for the chosen ones.

She will sing to the gifted ones.

She will cry tears of joy for the blessed ones.

She will wail in sorrow for the forlorn ones.

She has infinite power.

It’s only the beginning

Her power reigns over the universe

Her being is overwhelming

Her love fills all the hearts of the dead

Forget all that keeps you alive

For your salvation is here for you

Your death is the greatest sacrifice.

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Love-bound

e604bdbfe016c84aa2d170a51ac513bfToday is a special day for us my beloved.

We are officially, permanently bound by our infinite love!

Skull to skull, spine to spine, stem to stem, blood to blood…. yes.

Can’t you feel it? I do… oh I truly hope you do!

I feel our internal organs mixing into one entity.

I can see sweet, sweet death overtaking us! It’s glorious my beloved!

We will be together on the other side forever… and ever… and ever…

No longer will we have to hang onto this misery that we call an over lived life.

Ahhhh… no need to tremble! It will be alright! No need to be frightened.

Our time had come my dear, I just knew it did! But our bodies certainly did not.

So I did what our bodies could not do! First I melded you and I into one and used the steak knife to make it one and done!

We have been alive for what has been centuries sweetie, it’s time to go!

No more worries for you and I! No bills, no school, no parents, no silly ex boyfriends! And no silly ex girlfriends for me.

I knew that you would be the one for me the day I was born!

Come join me in the afterlife Hon, it will be fun! It’s not like as though you have much of a choice… I really hope you don’t mind!


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Life is filigree

Dark spots show more than light ones.

Sadness is my art.


Is life just a test?

If so, I’m sure I’m failing.

I can restart, right?


I don’t lie dear friend.

What I feel right now is real.

I feel nothingness.


Why do you smile friend?

What is there to smile about?

Please tell me dear friend.


My head is a mess.

Where do I even begin?

Sanity is gone.


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(You don’t have to do this alone… HELP is always within your reach!)

(Please help Depression Army and their noble cause!)

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Fatal

63e4107d1925c588057a05dbb39d3132The true monster lies within my head.

I know damn well that it wants me dead.

I feel as though I’m dangling from a single thread.

Sleep has never really been my thing…

I can’t feel joy whether if I write, dance, or sing.

I don’t want to answer the phone when it rings.

It’s ridiculous, no I’m ridiculous!

Take a good look at me.

What is it that you can see?

Maybe if you tell me the truth then you can set me free.

But I know it cannot be… the only one who can tell the truth is me.


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(Don’t do this alone… HELP is within your reach)

Please help support Depression Army and their good cause!

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