It’s Not Over

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Loss doesn’t mean the end of everything.

It’s only the beginning.

Forget the walls we’ve built and watch them crumble.

Every death leads to a new life.

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The Story of the Bird Under the Shade

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The story of the bird under the shade goes something like this:

The bird under the shade exists for a reason, but the bird knows not that reason.

He stays underneath the tree where the cool shade resides. 

Safe from all harm, protected from the weather, a perfect spot for safety and comfort.

He kept the shade all to himself and rarely shared it with anyone else, fearing others would steal his shade. He never wanted to leave the shade for he feared that he would risk his own life. 

So he kept himself sheltered from anything that could ever go wrong.

When he welcomed other birds to accompany him in his shade, they would only stay for a short while. The ones who continued to be companions with the bird would often come and go.

The new birds who came into his life showed him there was more beyond this one tree. Warm sunlight, gentle breeze, sweet sights, enticing smells, new adventures. 

As intriguing and enticing all of it seemed… things did seem to get stale underneath the shade; nonetheless he wished to stay under the shade.

One bird came along who cared for the bird in the shade. Both birds cared for one another greatly and wanted to go do great things. The new bird tried to show him all of the great things beyond the tree he stayed under. 

But unfortunately, it didn’t matter if there was anything better out there for him and he pushed the bird who cared so much for him away. 

The bird who cared for the bird under the tree felt unhappy and knew it was time to go. He made it clear that he lived a life in fear, and couldn’t let it go.

The caring bird, heartbroken, flew off into the distance. She perched herself on a branch, brushed off her wings, and flew high into the sky, seeking new adventures and the happiness that follows.  

The bird under the shadow still remains under his tree. Regardless of if he moves to different trees or not is all up to him. Even if he does try to move beyond the tree, he will always stay under the shade he keeps with him. And with the shade, comes a lack of understanding the purpose that this bird holds within its feathers.

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Dream Journal: Bridge Crossing Companion

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If I have a dream of someone who I feel close to giving me a helping hand, then what does it mean? Does it mean that we’re meant to be, that our paths have intertwined for a reason? Does it mean that maybe we serve a purpose in each other’s lives? Most importantly, what if we already know this person in real life?

In this dream, I was faced with the same obstacle over and over again. I felt fearful every single time I had to cross a bridge. It didn’t matter what the bridge was made of, where I was going, or what was waiting for me on the other side, I just knew I was afraid to cross every single one of them. Every bridge was made of wooden planks, twine, and rope. Some of the bridges were short while others spanned for a long distance. The bridges lead from different places such as a county flea market which featured tents and small buildings, a dojo on top of a hill which had a moat surrounding it, a simple gas station and automotive store nearby work, and places that had such weird odds and ends. A heavy fog would sit underneath every single bridge I had to cross. I had no idea how far down the fog went, I just knew that I needed to stay away. The thing that stood out to me the most was that there were voices that either encouraged me, discouraged me, or put me down while I was going from one side of the bridge(s) to the other. Sometimes I could see the individuals clearly while with others I could barely see them at all. I remember as I crossed these bridges, planks, people, and even random objects would fall off the bridge(s) I crossed.

One of the last few bridges I crossed led to an area that had the gas station, the automotive store, and a few small concrete buildings around it. One of my coworkers, we’ll call him Marco, who I’ve felt deep feelings for, saw how frightened I was. I cried softly and cowered in fear, explaining to Marco about being afraid to go alone on these bridges. Every bridge I went on felt like an eternity…. now that eternity turned into something else, something better. Marco was very kind to me. He put his arms around me, and came with me as I crossed the bridge. I felt bad at first because he had to drop some of his friends behind just to help me. But, in the end he felt content to do so for he managed to find some things along the way. It was a journey for both of us, a magical journey filled with bright colorful energy and life. Soon I was able to feel more comfortable on these bridges; it took forever for me to get over the fear I was feeling, but I got through it.

I tried to insist on taking on these bridges on my own, but Marco discouraged me from doing it. I thought maybe I was having a vision within a dream or maybe this was already happening, but the dream started to feel kind of distorted. I got onto a bridge and Marco was trying to tell me to get off of it. I started to hear all kinds of voices and saw people run back and forth around the different edges of the bridge. I was starting to feel unsteady when Marco said he would come back for help. I started to fall, but then a light force pulled me back up. It felt like Marco’s energy, but it also felt very benevolent. Maybe it was Marco with a helping hand, or something else. I’m not sure. What I am sure of is that I woke up feeling bewildered… perhaps there is a much deeper meaning to this dream that I thought.

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The Spirit in Blue- Transition and Transformation

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A colossal wave of cosmic light engulfed my whole being. The world that I barely even knew transformed into something that not even my wildest of dreams could manifest.

I don’t know begin to describe how I felt as the light swallowed me whole… thousands of words kept popping up in my mind, and neither one remotely matched this sensation.

Where in the world was this fiery ball of blue taking me? The wave of light dissolved the ground, trees, and sky into dust. The dust swirled around me and within an instant, a new plane of existence was formed. Everything shined of white, silver, and indigo. Chunks of levitating, moons, and smaller planets rotated around one another.

“Hey, spirit orb thingy! Where are we goi-” I pause for a moment as something small caught my eye. “Spirit in blue, where are you taking me?” The small object that appeared in front of me grew in size as we got closer. It was a… tree! A very large one at that. 

The gentle whisper that I heard earlier spoke softly into my ear once again. “The Tree of Transition and Transformation.” 

“The Tree of Transition and Transformation?” I asked intently, but got no answer in return. “Hello?” Still no response.

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The spirit in blue plopped me right between the sporadic roots of this colossal tree. I was in absolute awe when I gazed upon its beauty. It stood several stories high and was bigger than any structure known to man. It’s indigo colored bark fascinated me, I had to get closer up just to see if it was even remotely real. Indeed it was. It felt like the softest fabric I have ever put my hands on. Suddenly, several white and gold colored orbs appeared around me from nowhere. I looked towards the inside of the branches and dozens of multi colored orbs danced around the leaves and twisted vines. I never thought that anything like this could ever exist! Nothing short of a dream or a fairytale; except this isn’t a dream nor a fairytale.

I took a few steps back and sat upon one of the massive roots that were imbedded in the violet colored grass. The spirit in blue swirled around me and hovered a few inches from my right shoulder. I sighed deeply and looked at the spirit in blue who hovered by my side. 

“Is this the answer to my prayers spirit in blue? I feel like the whole world is against me, and I don’t know what to do.” I looked down for a moment, feeling a knot form in my stomach. “Can you understand me.” 

“Yes” said the gentle whisper. I felt a warm presence surround me; it felt like a person who had their arm around my shoulder… but it didn’t entirely feel human. Was it a ghost? An Angel? God? What was it? Nothing? What I DID know was that I could trust this being who was with me.

“I feel so lost man. I don’t know what to do anymore…” The knot in my stomach clenched and my whole body started to shake. I felt a hot coal form in my throat, it burned so much. Warm tears began to ran down my cheeks and I felt myself losing all control. 

The warm presence hugged my shoulders tighter as my emotions broke through the barriers I had held up for so long. In a way, I felt a sense of relief come upon me as I released these emotions. I knew that I was here for a reason, I knew I have purpose in this world. But, what in the world does all of this mean? What is the spirit in blue trying to tell me? Does this blue orb have all the answers to my prayers, better yet my problems?

To Be Continued 

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Dream Journal- “Yeah, I know, I’ve got your girl! What are you going to do about it?”

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Have you ever had one of those dreams that comes when you go back to sleep after sleeping for a while? Well, this is one of those kinds of dreams. Despite the fact that I can vividly remember my dreams majority of the time, I tend to have trouble remembering dreams if I have them when I go back to sleep. Here is the dream I had!

The first few moments of the dream are a little bit fuzzy. I could recall barely seeing a couple co-workers, a person or two that I dated in the past, and a few others whom I have never met before. There was a mesh of colors and lights for a while until I found myself and a few others on this dirt path by a small lake which faced a massive castle. It was beginning to get dark and stormy as a crack of thunder and lightning could be heard and seen in the distance. One of my managers, whom we will call Greg, nudged me and a few others to head into the castle. I could recall seeing many orbs, flying sparkles, and even elemental spirits flying about.

We went into the castle with which it’s interior kept changing. People started to separate into groups who searched around the castle. Doors would appear and disappear, spirits of the dead and odd creatures fluttered about. The floor remained at a constant color of red and black checkerboard. The ceiling was the stormy sky that was above us, yet no rain came down upon us. Was it maybe an illusion? A magical effect of some sort? The walls morphed from castle brick, to being painted white, to intricate victorian era design. Wall decor and objects in the halls changed around as well. In fact, some of these inanimate objects would come to life. A bust of an older man came to life and started to talk. I couldn’t quite understand what it said to me.

The one person in the dream that I used to date started changing forms constantly and so did a few others. I remember feeling like I was standing right by him, but in reality I wasn’t even there. I realized this to be the case when others in our niche didn’t even notice that I was there. I found that I was observing him and Greg from an odd angle. Greg took the guy I used to date and pushed him through a door. The door was filled with blackness and thunder and lightning briefly lit up through the door. Greg walked off to the left and absolutely disappeared while a few others went off in a completely different direction.

I found myself standing in the morphing hallway when another co-worker, we’ll call him Sean, called me over to what appeared to be a slightly outdated computer lab. Another person or two was in there, they were old classmates from my grade school years. Like the rest of the hall, the computer lab changed. Old computers were getting switched out with newer ones out of thin air, a green chalkboard appears only to be replaced by a white one. The desks and tables continue to change and upgrade around us. In the meantime during these changes to the classroom, Sean talked about himself briefly, but then starts engaging me by talking about my future, the ever changing walls of the castle, and my own well being. We start getting closer and closer to one another. Light orbs, color forms of energy, and light beings begin to come into the classroom and begin to create a portal of light in the white dry erase board. We kissed and held each other affectionately when all of a sudden, the thing that used to be the guy that I dated was a complete stranger… and I emphasize strange!

No one recognized him, not even Greg. It was like he was invisible to everyone else. I could see through the door he went through and it was a dismal. There was two rows of stairs, one on the left and the other upside down in the sky. The background was an endless dark sky with very dark colors. He was short, wearing medieval attire, spoke in a silly accent, and tried to manipulate me to join him on some journey that involved Unicorns. Sean called me over and wrapped his arms around me very tightly. It felt so real too! Sean and the silly shorty went at it with one on one. The shorty tried to argue with Sean who basically said, “Look, I know I’ve got your girl! What are you going to do about it? It’s over! Go on! Move on!” Eventually the shorty closed the door and walked away. The morphing hallway started to settle down into a solid structure and the pull towards the portal of light got stronger. Sean asked if I was okay and I responded saying I was. We got more affectionate until the light engulfed us, ending the dream.

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