Dream Journal: Short ‘Dream Bursts’

            The best way I can describe these dreams are ‘dream bursts’. I’ve been having the same repetitive dream over and over again, until up to two nights ago where they stopped. I’ve noticed I’ve had this pattern lately where I go from having very vivid, bright, colorful, and ‘happy’ dreams to very kind of dark, creepy, weird, opaque, mysterious, and sometimes totally fucked up dreams. Now, I’m not really too sure why this has been happening. I’ve kind of chalked it up to the amount of work and school stress in my current waking life, my diet (its been somewhat healthy on and off during this time, especially when I’m really stressed and overwhelmed), and also probably the things I’ve been interacting with on and offline, maybe possibly too many creepypastas and horror stuff, but I don’t know (and maybe per chance just sheer excitement for the holidays coming up including Halloween). I highly doubt that there is anything ‘paranormal’, ‘prophetic’, or that there’s any kind of ‘omen’ attached to them. But if anything acts repetitive in my daily life or dream state, then it will gain my attention. Disclaimer: I’m going to make it VERY clear that before I get into this, I have never ever had any dreams about Creepypastas until now. I also REALLY DON’T believe that there’s anything paranormal nor does it have any specific meaning to it. Please don’t take it that way. This is NOT a Creepypasta nor anything of the like. I think this is just a creepy coincidence that just happened because it happened. I’m not sure if the motifs in this dream have any correlation to what’s going on in my waking life only because I have not analyzed it yet.

Anyway, this particular dream starts off with the same scene then as every night passes with the same dream, something is added on or slightly changes. I really don’t know why that is. This dream that I had always starts at the inside of an old yellow school bus filled with kids ranging between late elementary to Jr. high aged kids. my vision is tilted upwards to the right and it feels as though I’m sitting kind of towards the back of the bus, but also like as if I’m leaning out or laying down. 

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The kids on this bus feel relatively normal to me. Nothing out of the ordinary as they interact with their peers, playing with small gaming consoles, throwing paper around, or giving the bus driver a hard time. The bus driver with every dream is either a man or woman with a big build, dark hair, and an over tired persona. I can’t really tell if I’m a present character in this dream because no one seems to pay any attention that I’m there.

At some point in time someone or something causes the kids to stop what they are doing only just to sit still in their seats and look forward. I believe it was the bus driver who snapped at them to stop. As the bus continues to drive forward, with every time I have this dream, its like as if the road the bus is on changes. Sometimes the road is dark and foggy like the morning mist that comes off the coast. Other dreams look like an ordinary day down the road with frequent stops where kids are let off to go home. And there have been the few where it looks like the road warps and fluxes through odd portals of time and space. The colors are so weird and disgustingly bleeding through. The one dream that was like that had flashes of light which startled me and everyone aboard the bus. Whenever the flashes appeared, the colors oozed and twisted in a really unappetizing way. The kids started to panic and look around not knowing what to do. The bus driver tried their best to keep them calm telling them to hold on. This is where it starts to get really weird.

 

At one point or another there are so many flashes within the dream where its just so hard to keep up with an know what is going on. It kind of looked like the little child from Trick R Treat is on the bus, or around it. At one point though, the bus stops on this wide peer in a harbor and the children get off. The scene kind of looked like something from The Misadventures of Flapjack because I could see some of the characters hanging around in the distance trying to interact with the kids. The dreary background from the show hangs in the distance with a discolored sky, white washed peer, and murky waters. There were also a lot of people standing on the peer, again looking like characters from the show. But it looked like they were either praying, chanting, or just plain standing there. A few of them again, tried to interact with the kids. The older kids came forward and started to question who these folks were and where they were coming from. Their speech became garbled and no one could understand what they were saying… but then some very different characters started to appear. It kind of reminded me of the Creepypasta: Candle Cove. The reason I say this was because I saw a skeleton with a cheesy top hat and monocle, a very scared and insecure looking pirate, and a whale-boat thing. My vision was steered to the right as I could see a collection of dark rocks and waves lapping the side of them. A massive flash of light came from the sky and it looked like a ship appeared out of no where from the water. The colors of the sky, water, and peer started to grow dark with dark mossy green and white to rusted red and copper. The people around the kids and the bus started to decay as their skin was peeling off and eyes bulged outward from their heads. It was like as though there was this invisible force that was yanking the life out of them. They rose their hands into the air and praised an invisible force. I started to freak out and got the hell out of there. I woke up just feeling so confused. 

Here’s the thing about this dream: I had it about 3-4 times until it transitioned into something else. I’ve had other bursts in between those 3-4 times I think, but I honestly really don’t remember. I really don’t know how to take this dream at all. Like I stated before, I don’t really know or think it has any particular meaning to it because of what I already stated above. Even if it did have some hidden meaning, I wouldn’t even know what I could do or think of it. Anyway, its happened, its here in this post. It was trippy. It was weird. But, trippy and weird are pretty much a few aspects of me in a nutshell. =)

-Alex

(all credit goes to the original owner(s) of featured media)

 

Weird & Creepy Experiences at Work

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The truth is we’ve all had weird experiences at work. Whether its an office job, retail, medical and educational field, blue collar, white collar, etc, things are always bound to happen. ESPECIALLY when you work with all kinds of people on a day to day basis. I’ve definitely had my fair share of working with interesting folks. I love where I work, I really really do. Its like my second home for me. Everyone I work with is just so kind and sweet to me. I enjoy everyday I come in to work. I really do. But, I also have been wanting to share some of my experiences with the strange and unusual because you just never know what could happen. Life can throw some quirky things that can either make you stronger or just throw you off kilter. 

‘Tis the Season: During the holidays was a very stressful time for me, and everyone else around us. I adore Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Autumn, Winter, and everything else in between. Sometimes I really have no idea why some people can get really nasty or tense during this time. All I do know is that I forgive and forget the people I interact with who can often be testy or impatient. I always give folks benefit of the doubt, because they could be going through a treacherous war within themselves that I might not have any clue about. However, there are still days where some of the things people do can throw me for a loop. Around the end of the year (around Christmas, or New Years Eve/Day, I can’t really remember when this was) I was wrapping things up for the night and clocked out. It was very cold and just dead quiet that night. I start walking to my car when an old man approached me asking for directions. His appearance seemed off as he was completely disheveled and walked in a really odd way. Mind you that this was at 9-10 pm and I was in the parking lot alone. I remember giving the man directions and he thanked me for it. I just got a really eerie feeling about it. I start to briskly walk to my car, hoping to just get the fuck home. He started to walk towards me and my car, and I just really started to get creeped out. I was shuffling for the keys in my bag so I could unlock my car. It frustrated me that my keys were in a sea of my belongings at the bottom of my backpack. As he got closer to me and my car, he said something to me with an eerie grin on his face. For the life of me I could not remember what he said. Finally I found my keys and jumped into my car with the man only a few feet away. I immediately locked my car and sped off. I have not seen him since then, and hopefully I won’t any time soon. 

Strange Coincidence: Sometimes, there are just some really strange folks that come into work. Like I said before, I give everyone the benefit of the doubt and try to act as friendly and welcoming as I can. I absolutely love people. I generally get along with just about everyone I meet and I love to make people laugh and smile. I hope that I can make an impression on people’s lives, even if its small and only lasts for a few moments. I believe that we all have a ripple affect on others and in the universe as a whole. Now, I don’t know if this happened just because I’m young female, or just because there are just some really strange people out there. Being kind and sweet to others can often be misconstrued as being flirty or overly friendly. A lot of the time that this happens, I simply just don’t give it any thought, not pay any attention to it, and go along with my day. I think this just might merely be a coincidence. This even happened a few months back during middle-late spring of this year. So, as I was working, I had this one man come into my lane and started to ring up his transaction. He seemed fairly friendly. He was tall with a pretty big body build, maybe 6’3 or so. He had somewhat long, dark brown hair, dark eyes, and seemed to wear somewhat normal attire. He had talked about how he was going to a Civil war reenactment and divulged into his fascination with historical events in America and what not. He talked about the event and suggested that I check it out. I didn’t really pay much attention to it and just went along my merry way. Now, the thing is, he started to come back to my lane for a couple days in a row, multiple times a day sometimes from what I can remember. One day, I just started to feel really uncomfortable, and he asked me something that just made my stomach churn. “Do you have a boyfriend?” Yes… Strange people have asked me this question, and I’ve gotten weirded out about it. But, the tone of his voice made me wonder that there was something more he might have been asking for than just to have a girlfriend. I shook my head and said “No”. “Would you like to have one?” He asked in a tone of anticipation. I again shook my head and kept my gaze forward, away from him. I again shook my head and said “No, no, no. In fact, this is really starting tomake me uncomfortable”. He said, “Well, it shouldn’t”. I again insisted that it was bothering me. He left with a face if massive disappointment. I immediately told my boss what had happened, and I have not seen that man since then. I’m thankful for the people I work with. They are so on top of things and do what they can to make you feel as comfortable and safe as you can while working. Again, I love where I work, but there are some folks that I hope I can steer clear from. 

World of Psych: Abuse

 

Forget numbing all emotion;

Lock the chest and swallow the key.

Your mind will loop and make a commotion;

I pray that expression of the melancholy from within sets me free.

Forget anger, guilt, and self blame;

Easier said than done, this I know.

Life is not a fucking game.

The heart is a pendulum that sways to and fro.

Stimuli from the many, drills us down to nothing.

It does not seem to matter what form it takes.

All in the name of need, greed, synthetics, and apathy; just something.

Wound, rung, and strained like rubber bands endlessly until it breaks.

Thank god this art sets me free;

Being tied from the inside, broiled from within.

Why did it take so long for me to see?

True perspective can come from separation of the oppressive kin.

Are they who they say they are?

Not unless you find what lies beneath the surface.

I’ve heard this all before.

Pushing those for truth and honesty is like pulling teeth.

I’ve been cracked open, exposing my inner core, bleeding.

‘Tis time to open the door to the unknown.

Don’t worry, these things happen for a reason.

Forgiving and letting go does not mean you must condone the damage that had been done.

Betrayal, lies, hurt, and treason.

I’ve been so close to throwing it all away.

I cannot do that.

Giving up leads to a price so impossible to pay.

I won’t because of the love and light within my heart, yeah that’s where its ‘at’.

-Alex

(all credit goes to original owner(s) of featured media)

 

 

Dream Journal: Boxer Rescue & Birthday Cake Conundrum

35fb9923e524a387f6112dac38c2112a   Last night I had a very light and heartwarming dream, one which I hope is a good sign. I can simply recall that I was living what felt was an ordinary day. However, this place was not ordinary. It reminded me of Portland Oregon, or perhaps Seattle, Northern California, etc. The grass and greenery around us had bursting jade and emerald all around us. The sky was clouded with puffs of grey and white. It felt as though it could rain at any moment because the air was slightly moist. my surroundings weren’t very busy and the houses looked very simple, average size, and were designed with neutral colors and lightly shaded foundations. I recall walking out of what looked to be my home out onto the grey sidewalk going on my way. I could recall hearing barking outside and found a boxer puppy hanging around the front of my house. The puppy reminded me of Zuzu when she was little. I picked up the puppy as I walked down the street under an oak tree. I saw someone coming down onto their wooden porch turning the light on to see what was going on. I had initially asked if they knew who the dog belonged too. They said yes and told me they were going to tell the person who lost the puppy that we found her. I said thank you as I stood there, waiting for someone to come to pick up the puppy. I wanted to keep him so badly, and I swear there was a moment where the dog could talk. She sounded like a small child and gently asked if she could stay with me, or if I could come stay with her mom. I told the puppy I couldn’t because I wasn’t allowed to keep her and that I had to go to work and she had to go back with her mom. The puppy fussed and was reluctant to the idea of going back. I started to walk towards the edge of the street to see if anyone was going to come. A few people walked by,barely noticing me, then all of a sudden, the owner who kind of looked like my mom and one of my co-workers combined came. 

hkitc111_after-yellow-kitchen-cabinets-close_4x3-jpg-rend-hgtvcom-616-462                 After this point, things started to move quickly. The owner thanked me, shook my hand, then offered for me to come in and have some tea for a little while. I followed her to her home with the puppy’s delight and immediately walked into the garage of her home. The lady’s home looked a lot like my childhood home. As soon as I walked in, all of our surroundings started to morph into this underground tunnel where a monster that looked like the Weeping Bat from Silent Hill Downpour. It was an absolutely nightmare seeing the woman running away from the monster and trying to protect the puppy. The monster wanted nothing to do with me unless if I got in the way. So I stood back. While this was going on, I fluxed between here and another dimension that had an outdoor, 2 story industrial kitchen attached to the side of a building. The kitchen had no door except for one open wall, and it was a very narrow room with stainless steel appliances. I could see one of my bosses, which I’ll name AL for now moving around in there and cooking. He asked me to come in and wondered how I was doing. AL also asked if I could work while he was gone. I told him I couldn’t because I had to take care of the puppy and try to help the owner. He said it was fine and that he’d help me as soon as he gets a second. I could not tell at all what he was doing or cooking for it looked as though he cooked and used a dish washer at the same time. I asked him what he was doing and why the kitchen had two stories. AL told me that he wanted to be in his kitchen and that its like his home, then he started to trail off and went upstairs, then back down then walked off. 

1ee134e30c4a48d78bd7bc62979dff5dOddly as AL walked off I went into the kitchen with birthday cake ingredients while trying to help the puppy. She seemed worried that her owner didn’t want her anymore. In between that we fluxed back with the woman walking out of her garage back onto the street I was at during the beginning of the dream. A few people, including one of my co-workers was with me, asking if I was ok. The puppy got excited to see her flustered neighbor. Out of no where, the owner exclaimed that she couldn’t take care of the puppy and couldn’t take it anymore. She stiffly walked off and waved the puppy away as she tried to run up to her. Shortly thereafter, the puppy came running to me joyfully and everyone around me cheered. I smiled and laughed as I scooped her up into my arms. I told the puppy that I had to quickly go back to the kitchen to finish the cake. She nodded and ran behind me as I showed up with the portions of the magnificently colorful cake manifesting into my hands. One of the co-workers showed up again in the same kitchen around the stairs. AL looked at me all confused and asked me what I was doing. I told him I had to make a birthday cake and he gave me an astonished look. I can not remember if anything else happened after that for I woke up not too long after.

Dream Journal: Trippy Nightmare shorts

I generally do not write about my nightmares. My dreams tend to be extremely colorful, vivid, and often lucid. So if its a nightmare or a trippy dream, it hits me hard. However, despite this, maybe its possible that maybe they have some valuable meaning to them. Are they omens? Results of daily stress and anxiety? Biochemical imbalances? Spiritual fluxes? Or last night’s dinner? They could very well be a combo of everything, but who knows. Anyway, here are some brief entries of nightmares I have had in the past (or at least the ones I can currently remember).

underground2Buried 6 ft under: When I was about 15-16, I recall laying in my bed staring up at the ceiling. I was jolted awake (or thought was awake) by this shadowy figure. My room and bed turned into a closed coffin being underground. I tried to push at the door trying to get out, but it wouldn’t budge. I could smell the damp earth around me and my chest started to tighten up. I felt like I was suffocating and I grabbed at my throat for some odd reason. I heard some noise above me, but could not tell what it was. Then shortly thereafter, I was jolted awake and everything seemed normal, except there was this heaviness that I could feel all around me. 

sniffer_dogThe mutated dog: I’m going to say right now, without a doubt that I did not help the situation in regards to this dream. I was 13 years old and my family had to put down our 13 year old boxer due to old age and health complications. When I was in Jr High, that’s when I really started getting into Stephen King and Dean Koontz books. (To the one who is reading this I’m sure you can see where this is going if you fancy horror anything). I started to get into Pet Sematary around the same time my dog was put down (I do not recall whether it was before my dog passed, but I want to say it might have been before). One night, I remember having a dream where I woke up in a field with tall straw colored grass with massive dark colored hills and greenery all over the place. It was kind of like the fields you’d see if you were in California, but more inland. The sky was a mixture of warm, watercolor hues and it was a nice day. But, it felt off. Like that off feeling when you take a bite of something like candy that you’d think would be sweet, but is actually sour. I recall seeing my dog and a few other kids running around the trees and into this tall field of corn. I tried to sprint after them, barely being able to keep up. The sky started to turn this really nasty cloudy lemon color and the earth below us started to dry out and crack. I saw my dog run next to a tree only to fall and collapse between a few big roots at the base. The other kids started to panic and ran off in different directions. And… I heard my dog calling my name, telling me that she was dying. I did not know what to do. Then she disappeared into a small clearing of dried earth in the middle of a field of grass which looked brownish-grey. She came back from the earth and did not look right. She was gangly, had disproportionate limbs, eyes of an insect, scruffy ears, disheveled patches of fur and skin. She started to levitate from the ground and I ran. Everything turned dark and then I woke up. I have not touched the book since then. 

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Highschool Stadium Violence: I can not exactly recall when I had this particular dream. I know that it had to be when I was out of high school for a little while. I’m pretty sure this was a little bit after I broke up with my high school boyfriend (he was a jealous asshole, mind you). I used to run track in high school, so every once in a while I have stadium based dreams. In this one I was at the stadium at my high school (which really did not look like the one at my highschool for this one was bigger and the colors were different), getting ready to watch a game, meet, or whatever was going on. I was with a few friends, some of them being guys, a few of them being girls, and my ex appears. At first he seemed ok, happy to see me. But then as soon as he saw a few of my friends, he flipped a switch. I tried to distance myself from him and ran up the higher stairs. I could recall my friends dispersing. He at one point catches up to me and pulls out a gun, which he did not point at me, but held it at his side. I recall trying to take it from him, and it went off. I could feel the kick of the gun and the sound echo in my mind as I was jolted awake. 

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Cardboard boxes: This was my most recent nightmare. Heaven forbid that I have anything like it again. It just proves that I’m at work way too much. Yes, I’ve had dreams about unloading boxes, shelves, stuffing, storage warehouses, you name it. However… this dream had to do with me taking boxes from a truck, cutting them open, removing the stuffing from them, then tossing them aside. I could see one of my co-workers faintly in the background as the boxes started to come closer to my face. They got so close to my face where it startled me awake. That I think was one of the strangest dreams I have ever had. 

 

One Small Step — Courage Truth Love

I’ve known many people who get overwhelmed by certain areas of their life or in certain situations, be it family, work, worries about the future, health, friends… I feel overwhelmed on a fairly regular basis and have come to identify it as anxiety. I remember in particular all the excitement of buying a flat was part-dominated […]

via One Small Step — Courage Truth Love

Dreams Update

   Good evening! My apologies for the lack of #Dreamshare and #Dreamgallery based posts. Since moving I was on a little bit of a time crunch until just now. School and work have been nutty! Finally things are starting to slow down a little bit and I am finally able to step back and breathe. I WILL have content in regards to dreams and meditation experiences soon. I’m just now catching up with my current projects, including this one. I’m hoping to have posts in regards to vision quest experiences as well as dreams and meditation experiences. For those who read my posts and follow me, thank you for your patience. ❤

To Dare is to Lose One’s Footing Momentarily. Not to Dare is to Lose One’s self. Soren Kierkegaard

When was the last time you did something that scared you? When was the last time you took a risk, not knowing what the outcome would be? Life is really about taking those risks and doing those things that you are uncomfortable with, or perhaps even afraid of doing. It is in doing these things…

via To Dare Is to Lose One’s Footing Momentarily. Not to Dare Is to Lose Oneself – Søren Kierkegaard — The Seeds 4 Life